The least sexy thing about puppies is the potty training. The land mines and invisible puddles all over the house, soaking your socks and stinking up every room of the house can get old pretty fast. That is why so many of us take on the task of housebreaking with vigor. We follow those pups around all day, just waiting for the right sniff or a slight hint of circling, and then BAM! We pick them up, carry the now startled pup into the back yard, and applaud the moment it eliminates outside. We do this ridiculous dramatization over and over all day every day until finally, your home is safe.
Well, the pups are now 7 weeks old and we are deep into this process when I discovered a new complication. It seems that the closer the pups get to understanding what is required of them, the less Derek seems to understand. You see, before we got the pups, Derek was potty trained. Not rarely-pees-in-his-pants-during-the-day-and-wears-a-Pull-Up-at-night kind of potty trained. I mean full-fledged, put-on-the-undies-and-forget-about-it potty trained. It was wonderful. I only had one left in diapers, and I figured she could start potty training at 18-months since she is a girl and girls learn faster than boys. (If this is flawed thinking, don’t tell me…I like this thought a whole lot!). Well, anyway, apparently Derek has become confused as of late. He still has control of when he goes, but…WHERE seems to be the problem. Apparently he believes that he has to go where the puppies go, and since the puppies go outside, so must he!
If you are just smiling and thinking about how boys will find any excuse to pee on a tree, you are right, but there is more. Derek pees on a tree, yes. But I think he has been doing that when my back is turned for a while. Now he goes in the middle of the yard as well, and he does not just go #1. Nope. Not Derek. Apparently #2 is also acceptable. He has walked in three times now, asking for help after he just…you know. He has decided that leaves hurt his little butt, and toilet paper is always missing when in the yard (imagine that!), so he just removes pants and undies and trots inside, asking for assistance. Really?? I thought we were done with this! Am I the only one that has to train puppies to go outside, and a three-year-old to go inside? Seriously? This doesn’t seem fair.